I am still in somewhat of a shock that my first born daughter is on her own. The space she left feels vacant, and I think of her all the time. Her life...it is her own now, yet it always was. Now it is just that I have to call her to learn about it. It is such a change, though one I can see is the way of it. (she'll probably want to trade in her cell for a more traditional line!)
I sat today and felt the overwhelming love I always feel when I nurse my youngest daughter. Amulet is 19 months, and she fell asleep at the breast with a darling little frog. Feeling her suckle, feeling the milk well up inside of me and let down for her, knowing that she feels safe and content, I will hang on to these moments and store them away for when I am 90. I won't waste a second of it. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world.
7 comments:
Nursing is so awesome! I am no longer nursing (sniff) but I remember all those little things, like how they would still suck after they detached, their eyelashes falling on their cheeks so peacefully, the suckling lulling them sleep. it's powerful stuff :))
I'm no longer nursing either (my youngest is 7), but your post brought back so many wonderful memories. :)
Jen in TX
I remember the very first time my first born smiled while nursing. Now 5 children later, that is still one thing that always brightens my days. I fact it is something I try to get at every nursing. :)
Heather
Hi Greenlee, I found your blog while doing research for an article on ritual jewelry. You have a great blog, and I support your unschooling philosophy.
My 7mo dd is nursing right now, and your post brought an ache to my heart. I want (hope) to remember all these times when I'm 90 as well. It all goes by so qickly, too quickly! My 3yo ds still nurses before nap and bedtime, but that's slowing down. Part of me wants to keep on having babies forever, the other part knows that my life has to run its own course. Thanks for your blog -- I read it almost every day. Peace,
Jen B
There are hardly words for how beautiful, sweet, and sensual the nursing experience is...at least, words I can barely voice. I want to plant this experience in my brain so I will never forget. I remember so vividly my first nursing daughter twenty years ago...I guess that is a good sign that we do not forget. :)
I saw your link on MDC. I love nursing babies! They are either sleeping or smiling and they are so cute still attached! Hugs to you missing your eldest out of the house.
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